Post salsa depression

I can’t stand post salsa depression. I just can’t shake it! This is when I imagine living in Melbourne for a year so I can go to regular classes that keep building me up.
Or maybe the grass is always greener.
It’s silly anyway because our small scene here actually suits me, I can slowly build trust with the committed regulars and work on my personal blocks.
To think I have to go through this again in November makes me wither! I can’t stand these highs and lows. I think being a highly sensitive person magnifies it for me, I’m looking around at my other salseros wondering how it is for them, are they seasoned at this, does it diminish over time. And this is from a small scale social! How would I cope at a congress or festival? I hope to get good enough to go, one day.

For my next lesson in November I want to prepare a short shine routine. Something that shows I’ve been working on my energy and musicality and body movement. I have many videos of myself salsaing in my lounge room and most are bleh but some parts are Ooo! How do I do that again! I want to find my own style that is sincere to me. I’d love to do a contemporary routine to work on my emotional expression too.

Times like this I always wonder, would I be brave enough to move away, I can’t bear the thought of being a nurse forever. Of course I’m only a nurse for part of my life. But I only intended to stay nursing for a few years. Now it’s difficult to stop.
What will be more difficult, to stay or to go?
I feel the lure of creativity in me and I wonder what I might be missing. The thought of pursuing dance makes my compassionate nature cringe. I’m dead sick of myself right now being so self absorbed with all this dancing business! Let alone if I pursued it, or singing or designing etc heavily.

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About cornstalk
Corn. Singer. Nurse. Lover of music. Pursuing God (trying...). Secluded. Pianist. Wannabe gypsy. Silly.

2 Responses to Post salsa depression

  1. Rebecca says:

    Why don’t you join a class in Melbourne and go once a month? That’s totally doable. Flights are pretty cheap. Stay at the backpackers or something. I have a friend who lives here and works in Sydney. He flies over, does a few shifts and flies home again. Probably cheaper than going to Hobart. And a solid investment, if salsa is that important to you.
    Join a beginners’ class until you can suss out where you’d fit. Melbourne isn’t a magical land of talent – it’d have just as many clompers as Launceston, haha. No need to feel intimidated!

    • cornstalk says:

      Clompers, haha! Yeah I’ve been looking up classes. Cheapest flights would be about $55 each way right?
      I know I probably wouldn’t like to move there really, I don’t enjoy being there for more than a couple of days. I guess it’s different if you make it your home though as opposed to just being a visitor.

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