Apart from being ridiculously overinterested in my love life (or lack thereof) my mum is a good egg. Honestly, it is as though it’s impossible to simply be friends with a guy, as soon as i breathe a word of anyone in my life who is remotely male, i get a

“Oooo! *eyes light up* and cue about a thousand needless questions. But why mum why are you even asking that?!
Well! Oh i dont know! Just looking for any information!

On a more serious note my relationship with my mum has taught me about closeness and pain.
When she was ill for about a year it involved a lot of lying down, not doing/saying much.
There was a lot of sitting together in silence.
Illness is such an isolating thing. But just being there with her, holding her hand, letting her cry, so she didn’t have to bear it alone and somehow we stumbled into solace.
The mother-daughter thing had been turned upside down and i became the nurturer.
Allowing herself to be vulnerable and to share her pain brought our relationship to a deeper level.
I realised the value of pain in life, that closeness can be found in letting others know your suffering.
It has renewed the place of pain in my thinking. Pain can bring beauty, wisdom, strength, depth to this life. Of course it’s everywhere, childbirth, saying sorry, what Jesus did on the cross…

“Do you not see how necessary a world of pains and troubles is to school an intelligence and make it a soul?”
―    John Keats,    Letters of John Keats



About cornstalk
Corn. Singer. Nurse. Lover of music. Pursuing God (trying...). Secluded. Pianist. Wannabe gypsy. Silly.

2 Responses to Mums

  1. andrensairr says:

    Mums do love to meddle don’t they! Bless ’em. You make some very insightful observations about the benefit of pain. Of course it’s never a good thing in and of itself, but society’s tendency to see pain and suffering as an evil that must be eradicated at all costs only strips meaning from something that is, at least for now, an inherent part of the human condition. This is also why I find a “Jesus will solve all your problems” kind of belief more than just a little objectionable. It has nothing to offer those who suffer on in spite of persistent prayer and supplication.
    On a side note, what type of flower is that? Those colours are beautiful.

    • cornstalk says:

      Yeah, the human condition is a good phrase for it.
      I can’t remember, the stamin makes me think it’s a kind of lily. It just sat on the bench for a few days and turned those colours.

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