Everything must change #4

From Brian Mclarens book, Everything must change.

Don’t get revenge when wronged, but seek reconciliation.
Don’t repay violence with violence, but seek creative and transforming nonviolent alternatives.
Don’t focus on external conformity to moral codes, but on internal transformation in love.
Don’t love insiders and hate or fear outsides, but welcome outsiders into a new ‘us,’ a new ‘we,’ a new humanity that celebrates diversity in the context of love for all, justice for all, diversity for all.
Don’t have anxiety about money or security or pleasure at the center of your life, but trust yourself to the care of God.
Don’t live for wealth but for the living God who loves all people, including your enemies.
Don’t hate your enemies or competitors but love them and do to them not as they have done to you—but as you wish they would do for you.

Idealistic. It sounds simple, but that doesn’t mean it’s easy.
But it’s the trying and the struggle that is significant, that builds character.
This is what i’ve been grappling with the last few years. Reconciling expectations with this reality.
The heavy expectations from church and from my own impressions reading the bible, ie to be a certain way or do certain things, to find your god given purpose in life, be on fire for god, telling others about him, bringing people to church.
How i’ve accepeted these, as the keys to the path of god and his kingdom, assumed they must be right. And yet i don’t seem like them (other people at church) so i must be doing something wrong.
And how i’ve tried, i looked, i couldn’t really find it.  I wasn’t satisfied, and i’m not going to pretend otherwise.
Like after getting so fired up at youth rallies, coming home, and…i’m still me.
Getting the message from church that you’re not okay, you need to change, or that god will change you dramatically.
Slowly i’m learning to look past the expectations and the guilt i’ve found at church and accept the reality of struggles in life. Learning that that is where god shows you things, teaches you.
It’s a slow journey, the hard work of transformation. And i wish the church shared more of this, instead of focusing on JAAL style messages, he died to set you free, live your abundant life, find your spiritual gift and serve in our ministries. What if jesus was about death? Death to the self? Sacrifice. But that sounds hard, who wants to hear about that.  I know i shouldn’t blame them, i need to take resposibility for my own feelings.


About cornstalk
Corn. Singer. Nurse. Lover of music. Pursuing God (trying...). Secluded. Pianist. Wannabe gypsy. Silly.

2 Responses to Everything must change #4

  1. andrensairr says:

    Yes and amen! Oh to hear more of this. The way I see it people could be forgiven for thinking there wasn’t much else to the bible except for John 10:10 (second half only of course), Jeremiah 29:11, and perhaps a handful more similar verses. They are great messages for those that need to hear them of course, but we so easily forget that Jesus also warned of trouble and trial for those who earnestly wish to follow him. The poet Milton put it: “Long is the way, and hard, that out of hell leads up to light”. It is a cross Jesus commanded us to take up, and a narrow road to follow.

  2. cornstalk says:

    Thanks for your comment. There must be more people who feel this way surely, it’d be scary if there weren’t. Were you there sunday night? There was some good content about the hard tests of faith but there was also some dribble and the way it was delivered that made me want to get up n go home, lol.

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